Laura Fernsten

The way we react to adversity can be a major factor in how happy and successful we can be in life.

I have been thinking a lot about Elder Wirthlins talk from this past Conference entitled “Come What May & Love It”. I have decided this is how I need to live my life.

I have learned so muchover these past two years. It wasn’t enjoyable, and sometimes it was all I could to do to get up in the morning.

I have learned that since my dads passing, that I am stronger than I thought. I have grown up a lot from it as well. Some days I still get down on myself, but I realize that He had a greater calling for my dad, and even though we needed my dad tremendously, that He needed him more. Heavenly Father knows the great and overall plan, & much, much more than I know. I can only imagine my dad doing great and marvelous things on the other side, with his smile and twinkle in his blue eyes.

I have learned with my back to be patient. Megan has been sick for years with her lung condition, and it might take me years to get my back to a better stage, but I understand her frustration of continually being put on different medications, shots, x-rays and doctor stuff. I have learned humility; I am usually very stubborn and set in my ways (as most of you know ), thinking that I can do anything and don’t need help. But things have changed. Now I look at a box, thinking that 8 months ago, I could lift this with no problem, or even thinking about it. Now I have to stop myself and think “I could pick up this box, but it will hurt, and it will hurt tomorrow and cause my back more damage”.  I may not love having a disease, and admitting that I am sick and need help, but I have learned so much from it already. I have met wonderful people who are in physical therapy that are going through what I am going through. I have learned that I sometimes have to rely on other people and that I CAN’T do everything on my own. Perhaps Heavenly Father is trying to teach me lessons and qualities from which I lack and I can gain knowledge and experience from by having this disease.

Elder Wirthlin councils us to:
Learn to laugh
Seek for the Eternal
The Principle of compensation (my favorite part)
Trust in the Father and the Son

Learn to Laugh

The first thing we can do is learn to laugh. Have you ever seen an angry driver who, when someone else makes a mistake, reacts as though that person has insulted his honor, his family, his dog, and his ancestors all the way back to Adam? Or have you had an encounter with an overhanging cupboard door left open at the wrong place and the wrong time which has been cursed, condemned, and avenged by a sore-headed victim?

There is an antidote for times such as these: learn to laugh.

The next time you’re tempted to groan, you might try to laugh instead. It will extend your life and make the lives of all those around you more enjoyable.

Seek for the Eternal

The second thing we can do is seek for the eternal. You may feel singled out when adversity enters your life. You shake your head and wonder, “Why me?”

But the dial on the wheel of sorrow eventually points to each of us. At one time or another, everyone must experience sorrow. No one is exempt.

I love the scriptures because they show examples of great and noble men and women such as Abraham, Sarah, Enoch, Moses, Joseph, Emma, and Brigham. Each of them experienced adversity and sorrow that tried, fortified, and refined their characters.

Learning to endure times of disappointment, suffering, and sorrow is part of our on-the-job training. These experiences, while often difficult to bear at the time, are precisely the kinds of experiences that stretch our understanding, build our character, and increase our compassion for others.

Because Jesus Christ suffered greatly, He understands our suffering. He understands our grief. We experience hard things so that we too may have increased compassion and understanding for others.

Remember the sublime words of the Savior to the Prophet Joseph Smith when he suffered with his companions in the smothering darkness of Liberty Jail:

“My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment;

“And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes.”

The Principle of Compensation

“The third thing we can do is understand the principle of compensation. The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude.”

Trust in the Father and the Son

“God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son.”2 The Lord Jesus Christ is our partner, helper, and advocate. He wants us to be happy. He wants us to be successful. If we do our part, He will step in.

He who descended below all things will come to our aid. He will comfort and uphold us. He will strengthen us in our weakness and fortify us in our distress. He will make weak things become strong.

“The simple secret is this: put your trust in the Lord, do your best, then leave the rest to Him.”

“If we approach adversities wisely, our hardest times can be times of greatest growth, which in turn can lead toward times of greatest happiness.” I have learned that life is hard, and sometimes you know that there is a rough road ahead, and all you can do is put on your seatbelt and helmet and take it head on. You can laugh at your hard situation; it gets you farther in live if you have a positive outlook on life, and can make light of a situation. You must remember that in the overall picture, your adversities and afflictions are just a small moment, and you will be rewarded for enduring them well. The Lord will compensate from what he has taken from us. Come what may & love it.